GASP alert 1/30/2006 The World Peace Bell

If you ever go to Newport KY. just accross the Kentucky river from Cincinatti, OH be sure and visit the World Peace Bell at York and Fourth streets. You can't miss it. It's the largest free-swinging bell in the world! It weighs sixty-six THOUSAND pounds and it is REALLY, REALLY, BIG! You will be awe struck when you see the World Peace Bell for the first time. It really stands out from the other attractions Newport has to offer such as the used furniture stores, the emasculated storefronts, and the occasional panderer...

The World Peace Bell was installed in 1999 thanks to the Verdin company, the largest manufacturer of bell and clocks and stuff. The Peace Bell commemorated the new millinium in 2000 and is rang every year on September 21 for the International Day of Peace established in 1981 by the United Nations where bells all over the world ring to remind us of our goal for world peace.

Big fancy smancy, huh? It just puts a whole other angle on the term, 'bellringers'.

Newport is also home to another fancy invention-- the Thompson submachine gun aka the 'Tommy gun'.

The Tommy gun was designed to 'sweep out the trenches' for our boys across the pond in the big one, dub-ya dub-ya one (WWI). General John Thompson finally got a prototype produced and don't you know the day the first shipment was supposed to be shipped the war ended, on November 11 1918. This day became Armistice Day in 1919 by President Woodrow Wilson. It is now called Veterans Day.

The Tommy gun became notorious during the prohibition period and was mass produced for dubya dubya two(WWII). But then it became obsolete because it was so damn cumbersome-- just like a huge bell!

I have a great idea. Lets create a new holiday. Lets call it 'The Day That Santana Got Strapped to Huge Bell in Newport KY. and Was Shot Up with a Tommy Gun Machine Gun'. But before we did that we would shoot up his guitar and watch poor Santana cry. Yeh, now that would be fancy!

How many times can I write the words, 'shitfuckdam' b4 it gets old?

OK. So here we are... at least well I am here... are you? IN ANY CASE let's assume that we are a "we" here in the great void we call cyberspace. How many times could I write the words 'shitfuckdam' before you get annoyed enough to go somewhere else? hmmm.

I don't know. My guess is probably about 200 or so words. Let's give it a try. C'mon it'll be fun!

shitfuckdam. Ok that wasn't too bad. Lets try it again.




shitfuckdam. Hey, You're still here!



shitfuckdam, shitfuckdam, shitfuckdam, and one more time shitfuckdam,shitfuckdam, shitfuckdam, and still once more shitfuckdam, shitfuckdam, shitfuckdam. Dam! This is great!



shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdamshitfuckdamshitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam-shitfuckdam!

Phew. OK how many was that?

Hello? Hmm. I guess it only takes about 50 shitfuckdams to get rid of you. Well now 'we' know.

GASP alert 1/25/2006 The Socratic Method of Thinking

0430000103500

I'm not even a would-be intellectual... I'm just an every day ordinary 'aunt b' intellectual.
Yeah so I'm learnin' me some philosophy. 'Philo' meaning love and 'sophia' meaning wisdom. My cat's name is Sophie and she is a wise kitty.

So Socrates dude was interested in how we derive notions of virtue. He conversed with the nobles he conversed with slaves. Through objective analysis of these discussions Socrates proved that everybody is full of shit. Thus he formed the Socratic Method of Thinking.

"It is by finding out what something is NOT that one comes closest to understanding what it is."

Well, OK, lessee...

If one was a Shaman would he be respected by all?

I should think so.

Yes but what if this person really wasn't a shaman at all-- in fact this was just an image the person used to make people think he was 'mystical'!

Why by Zeus! The man should be fed to the Lions and all that praised such a man would be fools!!

OK. If he is NOT a shaman but was still respected by many could the person be 'supernatural'?

Well, if he lied about being a shaman and yet people still believe him and praise him then--yes! I guess he would be.

But consider this: Maybe this is a man of labels only; what if he was not supernatural but was able to lure many people his way because he was 'smooth'?

Hmmm. Now you might be splitting elephant hairs.

Yes, but what if a great deal of people saw the person for who he really is-- an enterprising novelty that was milking a tired 'image' he had created way back when and was lending his one and only 'gimmick' to a group of pop artists that would tolerate him just so they could propel their own visions of grandeur in a world that was 'boxed in' by filthy, gluttonous overlords who didn't mind wallowing in the mainstream cespool they had created and were simply counting the 'ticks' until the final cut had been made and the old rotting plasma arc ceased to be no more in the wake of the NEW technology-- THE technology I am commuting to you right now, my friend, because in the NEW world you're either WITH US or YOU ARE NOT, and there is no in between-- but then again we are not 'boxed in' either--at least not by terrestrial standards; no we are free to choose-- and in this REALM there are no SHAMANS-- no grey areas or menacing shadows-- no supernatural acts of courage or virtue here because you're either IN THE LIGHT or you're up shit creek without a paddle-- and a self-effacing attitude is detrimental to your SMOOTH survival in the nether world-- because there are soooo many options to choose from-- but only ONE that gives you the power TO FORGET all the stupid awards shows, all the stupid speeches, all the perversely contagious commercials-- TO FORGET ALL THE BASTARDS that would sell you your own feces if it would boost ratings...
and so that, my friend, is the Socratic Method of Thinking.

OH, OK.

STOP SANTANAGANDA
GUARD AGAINST SANTANA PROLIFERATION.

GASP alert 1/17/2006 Humble Pie!

GASP alert 1/17/2006

Thanks to Ben and his blog, www.whrsmymnd.blogspot.com I am learning new stuff. I like new. I like stuff!

The Consolations of Philosophy is a book written by Alain De Botton. I have yet to read it but I did find an interesting review on my favorite media retrieving organization, google.
This book was published in 2000. What is the difference between a person's opinion and a person that posesses true knowledge?

Well, obviously the person that possesses knowledge is a Shaman and is so 'smooth' and 'supernatural' that we just couldn't get enough of him...

I don't propose to know a lick about philosophy. But I do know that some philosophers had a pretty dim outlook on human nature; that we are doomed to live a miserable wretched life consisting of perpetual dilusionment and the only way to enlightenment is to rid yourself of all possessions.

Yes. Even your Santana collection. How bleak is that?

But Scruton acknowledges a very important angle that explains a lot of the 'dumbing down' going on around us: It's OK to ask questions-- you're not a snob or an elitest for trying to find real knowledge!

"Tell somebody something they know already and they will thank you; tell them something new and they will hate you for it."

Jezesfreakinchrist! When I think about all the humble pie muthafuckas out there that bow to the tune of a nitwit named Larry the Cable Guy, "Git r Dun!", I just want to put on my Abraxas album and fade away into the Mexican sunset.

"The danger of democracy is that by giving equal weight to all opinions it threatens to marginalise those who know."

But this looks like a good book for someone who wants philosphical theories explained, eg. Socrates, Epicurus, Seneca, Montaigne, Neitzche.

Neitzche. Every would-be intellectual should get one.

So the Golden Globe Awards were last night. Man, Johny Depp's wife is kinda on the skanky side. Geez. Maybe she gives really good head. Maybe Johnny Depp possesses true knowledge which clouds his perception of beauty. Maybe all that Johnny Depp cares about is his Santana action figure doll and how he'd give his left nut to get Santana in a Pirates of the Carribean sequel.

True Story. I interviewed for a job in Frankfort, Kentucky, to be an electrical engineering technician with the local municipality. A little shithole of a place with wood paneling and tiny rooms. I was sitting in the lobby waiting for my interview and I started reading a plaque up on the wall commemorating the original crew of engineers that created this municipality. Halfway down I saw the name John C. Depp. Hmm. Turns out that's Johnny Depp's daddy. Yep, the world's sexiest man's father is a boring crusty old electrical engineer in the capitol city of Kentucky. humble as pie.

GASP alert 1/13/2006

Gerrreeetings and welcome to a special FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH EDTION of the GASP alert. It has come to my attention that another GASPALERT! exists at http://lists.envirolink.org/mailman/listinfo/gaspalerts.

Their GASP stands for Group Against Smog and Pollution and is a boring lil' non-profit group in boring southwestern Pennsylvania.

I am urging everyone who is a loyal Guard Against Santana Proliferation to contact the other GASPALERT and ask them to change their name. I would rather not be associated with some hoity-toity environmental group If I don't have to.Of course, since I am probably the only one who reads my blog then I guess it's just a problem I'll have to deal with myself.

Oh yeah. I have a real treat out there for the loyal guard. Be sure and check out this dude's blog www.hankscoop.blogspot.com

Thanks Hank! In lieu of this newest blog discovery I am in complete disarray.

While I am over hear busting my balls over some silly Santana shenanigans he's over there fucking some hot whores-- and posting it on the web! Damn and to think I could've been enjoying some prime spankin' instead of doing this mumbo jumbo bullshit.

Oh well. I guess I'll never learn. The really sick part to this whole twisted freak scene is that guy Hank has probably got every Santana album ever made and he probably plays some off Supernatural when he's ballin' some whore.

And she's probably like, "oooh make it real or else forget about it! Ooohh."

Stop Santanaganda now. Guard Against Santana Proliferation.

GASP alert 1/11/2006

Stevia. It's a 'nutritional supplement'. Maybe you've seen it at your local grocery store in the 'natural foods' section.

The FDA does not allow Stevia to be labeled as a 'sweetner'. Why? Well as the story goes our own Donald 'Rummy' Rumsfeld stood to make a pretty penny back in the early eighties when a new food additive, aspartame was introduced on the market.

Also known as nutrasweet, Rumsfeld was the president of the drug company, Searle, which produced what was originally supposed to be an ulcer aid.

Well hold on to your pants, after numerous complaints and a review by the CDC that had surmountable evidence of health risks associated with aspartame,Pepsi Cola initiated an intense marketing campaign that put Nutrasweet in every home in America.

Pepsi Cola chairman, Donald Kendal, a good friend and 'confidante' of former White House Chief of staff Rumsfeld got a pat on the back for a job well done.

According to James S. Turner, the source of all this information, 1995 reports show human brain tumors reminicent of the orgianal animal aspartame study groups increased 10%.

Ok, well so I can regurgitate some facts. If you want to know more visit http://www.stevia.net/aspartame.htm and get the full story.
But allow me to draw my own conclusions first. Obviously the 'sweetner' industry is huge. I mean we may not have had slaves if sugar cane wasn't the hottest commodity in the world. So it stands to reason that an alternative like Stevia, which apparently is a lot better for ya sick ass would be hush-hush.

Yep. Well apparently Stevia is pretty big in Japan so maybe I'll just go live over there and escape all the facist oppression here in the US. Not to mention all the Santanaganda.

Hey Santana, what would Che Geuvera choose to sweeten his Sugar Smacks? Capitalist- driven, sugarcane or pure, lucious, sweet leaf from the jungles of Venezuela?
I suppose you're choice would depend on which group buys the most Santana CD's huh?

Stop Santanaganda now. Guard Against Santana Proliferation.

Roooodee!

check out www.columbiacitypaper.com. This is a very contraversial alternative weekly recently published in Columbia South Carolina. The editor resigned because someone set fire to his apartment. There's a pretty good article about Rudy Giuliani and his unscrupulous quest for wealth. Apparently he accepted $20,000 at a charity benefit for Tsunami victims last year. That's pretty damn rude. "Hey you know why they call you Rudy? 'Cause you got NO CLASS." Also some good insight on Rudy's 'consulting' firm and his ambitions for the upcoming election. Geez, you think about all the rat scum out there that scammed and stole and frauded America during 9-11 and this guy, the mayor, gets rich by being at the right place at the right time. Anyways, anybody need a job as editor? Do ya like palmettos?

GASP alert 1/04/2006

So what's on my mind for the first 2006 edition of the Guard Against Santana Proliferation? Listening to oldies, renting a car, what real friends are all about, peace, love, hate, ignorance, complacency, jobs, sex, lunch, and how incredibly smooth and supernatural Santana is. Will he be playing at the Superbowl? Will Gretchen Wilson be there? I dunno. not a whole lot I guess...but then again,there's Cincinnati rock n' roll aka Heartless Bastards, they rock ou-- saw them at the Northside Tavern for FREE and it rawkt. Went out and bought the CD the very next day and they are on Fat Possum records which also supports the Black Keys and Hasil Atkins. Hasil Atkins is the founder of psychobilly in my opinion. Course he's not to smooth... I believe he might be a Shaman.
Geez. Being 'aware' of music and not just indie rock either-- bluegrass, salsa, meriachi (sp), bollywood, classical, neoclassical, zimbra, etc. is like taking a drive out to the country at night and being amazed at all the stars you never saw in the city. I'm so freakin metaphorical. Party on Wayne.